That is how I have felt the last two days. Why?
Because “Aunt Flo” is here.
I am getting sick and tired of feeling this way for at least a day or two every single month.
I have zero energy (not good with two children to care for – that certainly requires more energy than it takes to lay in bed all day), cramps (that fortunately can be controlled with Motrin – pre-surgery there were many times I couldn’t control the pain by simply popping three pills every 4ish hours) and I am just “on edge” which could be translated to “mean”.
I don’t talk much about my own infertility any more on this blog because, quite simply, it is in my past and it doesn’t affect me in the least bit anymore – except on days like today and yesterday.
But I’m telling you, if I could, I would have it all taken out tomorrow. It serves NO purpose in my life except to make me a Mean Person a couple days of every month.
I am way less patient with my children when I feel like this and I am currently sitting at home alone while my family goes off. I just didn’t have the energy to get up and go and be social.
I think if my “cycles” had ever served a purpose in my life, I would have more patience with them right now! But I can remember thinking as a teen and when I was writhing in bed from painful cramps, missing school, that one day, this would all be for something.
Because one day these cycles were going to allow me to become a mother and have a baby!
Well, these cycles have done nothing but bring misery to my life since they began for me at the age of 13!
And I’m sick of it!!!
I’ve thought about trying to get on birth control to level my hormones out, but birth control and I do not get along. Last time I was on it, it left me feeling dizzy and nauseous 24/7. That is no way to live life, either.
Guess I just have to stick this out until menopause. Oh, menopause, come quickly. I know. Menopause isn’t fun. But it will be a season of “not fun” and then I will be free from menstruation for the rest of my life. AMEN.
End of rant.