“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plan to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11
Great is HIS faithfulness for great things HE has done!
As I shared not too long ago, God opened our hearts to adoption back in December. Still in the thick of infertility treatments, I honestly believed that God was going to give us at least one biological child and then eventually we would adopt to extend our family.
Turns out God had something more planned.
If you have been following my blog you know that in March we did an IVF cycle that failed miserably because of a poor response to the fertility medications.
Now looking back on a month that was the darkest time of this infertility journey, I know now that God used that IVF cycle to set the stage for the something more He had planned from the very beginning of time.
After that IVF failed God asked me to do something that cut me to the core of who I am.
He asked me to surrender my desire for pregnancy and childbirth to Him.
I’ll be honest and tell you my immediate reaction to this request was, “Are you sure about that, God? After all, You did create me with the desire to experience the miracle of pregnancy and childbirth since I was a kid. So, why don’t you think that one over again!”
The response I got was: TRUST ME.
It was quite possibly the most scariest and exciting decision I’ve ever made in my life.
I knew I had to just trust Him.
Over the past two years of struggling with infertility, God has taught me something that has totally changed the way I look at being infertile.
God’s plans for my life are far better and far bigger than anything I could ever plan for myself.
And so I knew if God was asking me to surrender this deep desire to experience the miracle of pregnancy and childbirth, I had only one choice.
Towards the end of March, I really started to feel an urgency to get the paperwork and family profile ready to turn in to the adoption agency. I diligently worked on filling out paperwork and my mom and I spent many hours doing the family profile.
On Friday, April 3rd, my friend from church who adopted a baby from this same agency told me to call her because she had a lot of information for me.
That night I learned there are four birth mothers due this summer. All of the babies had been placed however there was one adoption that may fall through.
Not one to get my hopes up for unrealistic reasons, I didn’t think much of it.
Instead I focused on my goal to get all the paperwork and family profile turned into the agency on April 7th, 8th or 9th.
On Thursday, April 9th, I had everything ready and drove to the agency.
If I had gotten to the agency five minutes later, I would have missed the lawyer as she was exiting and locking the building as I arrived!
I jumped out of the car, told her I was there to drop off my paperwork and family profile and she opened the door and took me inside.
She knew who I was because my friend from church had told her about me.
We went into the office and as long as I live I will never forget the words I heard next:
“We had an adoption fall through so if you want a baby in June you can have one!”
Immediately I knew I was living a miracle …
Sometime between Saturday and Thursday that adoption had fallen through.
This was why I had felt the urgent need to get our paperwork turned in as quickly as possible.
And, this was why God needed me to surrender my desire for His perfect plan.
I left the lawyer’s office that day in complete awe of our faithful God.
There is absolutely no way I, or anyone on this earth, could have orchestrated all that!
Only a God who had something more planned could do … a miracle!
It’s a GIRL!!!
TO GOD BE THE GLORY,
GREAT THINGS HE HAS DONE!