Six years.

It is crazy that Dave has only been apart of my life for 1/5 of my 30 years! (How do you like that math?!)

It is hard to even remember what life was like before January 26th, 2006!

Here are some pictures from those early years with Dave. Less than a month after our wedding, we went to Rio de Janeiro, Brazil for my cousin’s wedding!

The Botanical Gardens

These palm trees are absolutely gorgeous!

Churrascaria…Heaven on Earth for Dave! Waiters come out with meat after meat and you can eat as much as you want.

The Statue of Christ – from up there you can see the gorgeous city of Rio!

Those of you that don’t know me in real life probably don’t know this, but Dave and I really enjoy traveling.

Obviously it is not something we can do often at all now!

But in the two years before Little Bug came along, we did get to go to some pretty awesome places in this world!

I love Bethany. She is such a hoot and she loves my girls!

She asked if Little Bug could be her flower girl and even though I knew she would only be 2 years old at the wedding, I said yes.

I had no clue how Little Bug would do as a flower girl! I knew my only hope was making sure she at least got a little nap before the wedding at 4pm. We got checked into the hotel and the family went out for lunch but I stayed behind with my girls so they could both nap.

We got to the church and headed in to get Little Bug dressed. I didn’t take any pictures of the actual wedding ceremony because I was too busy with the girls!

But I did get some great pictures at the reception.

But first…a description of Little Bug in her flower girl role.

She took two steps into the isle and proceeded to dump her entire basket of flowers into a heap on the floor.

She was walking with two boys. Little Bug started trying to pick up the flowers to put them back in her basket and the boys stopped to help her.

Once many of the flowers were back in her basket, they started walking down the isle but about half-way down Little Bug stopped again and started getting flowers one at a time and dropping them onto the floor. Only problem was she wasn’t continuing to walk down the isle! After the boys tried to get her to start walking again to no avail, the wedding director helped her finish her walk down the isle where her Uncle was waiting to scoop her up and carry her back to me.

Now for the pictures…

I asked her to give me a smile and it was the first time I got the “cheesy smile”.

My Grandpa with two of his grandchildren (my brother and me) and his two great-granddaughters (my girls)!

The Bride and Groom’s first dance

Bethany gets her dance moves honestly. Both her mother and father can dance and both did a dance with her at her wedding, which was very special to watch!

Little Bug found herself a dance partner, although I am not too sure her Daddy would have approved of this!

So she danced with Uncle instead…

It was such a beautiful, fun wedding! The girls did great staying up past their bedtime and everyone enjoyed the evening very much.

The beautiful bride wanted a picture with my baby girl.

I am so happy for Will and Bethany and pray the Lord blesses their marriage tremendously as they seek to serve the Lord as a couple.

My sweet girls

Little Bug is getting sooooo big!

Here is a picture of her on this little bridge last year:

The last time we were at the mountains was in May, just two days after we were officially matched with Melody. My mom and I prayed for the upcoming adoption back in May and now, five months later, we sat on that very same bench with Sweet Pea. My mom yelled, “Thank you, Lord!!!” It was a sweet reminder that God is so good to us.

He walks us through the fires of life, teaching us along the way.

And eventually, we find ourselves standing on the mountaintop with God. He is there. In the valleys and on the mountaintops.

The mountains and beautiful fall colors just proclaim the majesty of our God. As we would drive from the cabin to the next town over, the mountains were overwhelmingly beautiful. To think God sculpted them with His hands. Our God is mighty and if we put our faith in Him, He moves the mountains of our lives and makes the impossible, possible.

Little Bug asked Uncle to play the guitar for her before bedtime one night.

Little Bug and Uncle carved a pumpkin!

Sweet Pea wore her first pair of footed pajamas because even wrapped in the miracle blanket, it was cool enough for footed pj’s!

Little Bug and Grandpa took their annual “walking stick” picture!

Here is last year’s picture:

On Friday, Rebecca, Micah and Levi drove to the cabin to spend the afternoon with us! We went to a nearby park where Little Bug and Micah had so much fun playing.

Little Bug said, “Micah, help me get up!!”

Rebecca and me!

After a fabulous week in the mountains, we left for my cousin’s wedding on Saturday. Little Bug was the flower girl.

That post will be coming next!

Little Bug is very much into having picnics with her stuffed animals, so Grandma and Grandpa gave her an authentic picnic!!

Grandma made her a heart-shaped peanut butter jelly sandwich.

Eating her sandwich and stopping to look at her stickers.

Meanwhile, I was flying to the mountains with Sweet Pea. Sweet Pea was an awesome little traveler. I arrived in the early afternoon and was picked up by Rebecca!!

We enjoyed spending the afternoon together while I waited on my family to come by and pick us up so we could make our way to the cabin for the week.

Rebecca fixed a delicious soup for dinner and Little Bug and Micah (Rebecca’s son) had a blast playing together. They played very well together.

We attempted a picture of all four kids!

I didn’t really get a good one. I included this one because notice how Little Bug is getting up. When she holds Sweet Pea that is what she does when she is all done holding her…she just gets up, with Sweet Pea still in her lap! Poor Levi was ready for a bottle and that is why he is upset. Micah looks like the typical boy apeasing the women by taking a picture when he would much rather be off playing with his toys!

But there you have it…our four miracles, one of which brought our families together forever!

Then we tried for a picture of just the babies and this is the best I got!

We did not plan this at all but Levi was wearing his “Little Brother” outfit and Sweet Pea was wearing her “Little Sister” outfit!

I text a picture of the two of them to our lawyer and she enjoyed seeing the two babies together.

And that was our first day of vacation.

It was a great start to a wonderful week in the mountains!

We had a wonderful trip, although several times I know I said that I was never going to travel with TWO little ones again! (I know I will.)

For the most part, everyone did very well. Flying with Sweet Pea was…fun! I love to fly and at this age, Sweet Pea was very easy to fly with. She never made a peep on any of the flights. The only real challenge was making it to our connecting flights. I only had 30 minutes to navigate a HUGE airport with baby and luggage in tow, but we made every flight with minutes to spare. Little Bug enjoyed her trip and all the attention she got from her Grandma and Grandpa and her Uncle. I’ll do a post or two soon about our trip.

It’s been twelve days since I have posted and I think that is the longest “blogging vacation” I have ever taken since starting this blog almost four years ago.

Honestly, I was using that time to decide if I was going to continue this blog or lay it to rest.

I love this blog. I really do. I love writing. I love that God has given me the ability to record my journey through infertility and beyond.

I never dreamed God would turn this blog into a ministry, but He has. I love that. I love hearing from readers through email who need encouragement.

While on vacation I received an email from a reader asking me to please call her because they are adopting a baby who is going through withdrawals and she would just love to talk to someone who has gone through this before.

I love that.

But as with everything in life, there is the good side and the bad.

The bad side of this blog is something you don’t see.

I don’t know how many of my readers believe in the attacks of Satan on the work of the Lord, but it is never-ending for me.

Satan’s attacks, that is.

I cannot tell you how many times I write something straight from my heart about the faithfulness and goodness of God and….BAM. Satan attacks me.

Satan hates this blog.

For twelve days this blog was quiet and for twelve days my life was quiet, too.

I know this all may seem crazy, but it has happened too many times for me to not recognize the correlation.

So, while on this trip I spent some time thinking about this blog and what I should do.

It was stressing me out just thinking about it, so I stopped trying to figure out what I should do.

I know that I want to lay this blog to rest. It would just be easier to stop writing so Satan will stop attacking.

But I know that he will just find other way to attack me. And I love to write. It’s my way of processing things. If I am not writing here, it will be in a notebook.

So, as the airplane was making it’s decent into my hometown yesterday afternoon, I realized I had yet to decide if I was going to continue writing, or not.

As the plane found the runway, I found my answer.

I will keep writing.

God has done so much and I just cannot keep quiet.

For now, this is the place He has given me to minister to people who are walking the road I walked many years ago.

It is crazy that I can say many years ago.

I want people who come across this blog to see that infertility is not forever.

Yes, our bodies will be broken forever, but the pain of infertility is just a season.

If we put our faith in the Lord, He will bring us through the fire … and what lies on the other side is better than your wildest dreams.

You just have to keep persevering in the face of pain, trusting in God who promises His plans for you are good and will not cause you harm and will bring you hope and a future.

If you don’t see anything else from my journey through infertility, I pray you see that.

It’s good to be back.

I can’t promise God’s Faithfulness Through Infertility will be around forever, but for now, it’s here and as long as God gives me this place as my ministry, I will be here, too.

Little Bug and my parents will drive there and I am flying to the mountains with Sweet Pea. My brother will get to be there too since it is reading week at his seminary. As usual during this time of year, Dave has to work.

We will spend the week together in the mountains and then on the following Saturday we will be leaving the mountains and going to my cousin’s wedding.

Little Bug is going to be the flower girl! Her dress is adorable. An older ring bearer will escort her in so hopefully she will walk down the isle.

After the wedding, I will be going to spend a couple days with Rebecca before flying home on the 25th!

I will be taking a vacation from blogging, so I will leave you with this until I return.

Here is a picture of Little Bug from our trip last fall to the mountains!

I hope to get some beautiful pictures of my TWO girls this fall!!

While packing I came across a notebook where I wrote something last fall during our trip to the mountains. We were planning to begin the adoption process again in the summer. Little did I know that next month my second daughter would be conceived and the following trip to the mountains in the fall would be with my two daughters.

Here is what I wrote on the night of October 18, 2010:

As we near the time of starting to think about a second child I know I will find myself in a place once again where I will need to completely surrender to You and step back and watch You work your perfect beautiful plan. I am looking forward to this time!! Because now, more than ever in my life, I get it! I understand completely that you have a plan and it is better than my own. I can trust You and I won’t be disappointed.

I don’t know how you will bring our second child into our life…another adoption through [our agency]? another agency? a natural pregnancy? I don’t know, but I know You do and on this night I want to take my first step of faith towards this child by acknowledging that my desire is once again for God to receive glory as we take this journey to another baby. Use us. Use our infertility again to perform another miracle.

Regardless of how You give us another child, I am just excited to see what happens. I know another miracle awaits!

And here she is:

For great is his love toward us, and the faithfulness of the LORD endures forever. Psalm 117:2

The Ft. Worth Zoo was pretty amazing!!

The habitats for the animals were so BIG and natural. (But I guess that makes sense, since everything is bigger in Texas! ) This was the gorilla exhibit.

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Little Bug enjoyed her time at Mimi and Papaw’s zoo!

There were beautiful scenic areas everywhere you looked.

Amazing Aquariums

Papaw and Little Bug got up close and personal with the penguins!

And then we went to “TEXAS WILD”

Little Bug fell in love with the longhorns. After we left, when asked, “What did you see at the zoo?”, she would say, “Longhorns!!” Mimi showed Little Bug the longhorns!

Grandpa showed Little Bug the bats.

Leaving the zoo after another fun day with Mimi and Papaw!

We are so glad we got to visit the Ft. Worth Zoo!

She enjoyed looking out the window!

Milk Time!

So, I found I didn’t really need 15 books on the airplane, but she did enjoy reading all the books during the week and I was glad I had them for her.

On the airplane she wanted to read poems!

Then Little Bug had some fun with stickers. Those were a hit! Stickers were an easy thing to pack and they provided much entertainment!

The girl who has gone through only one outfit on most days since birth, peed through the diaper on the airplane. We got her cleaned up and changed in the tiny airplane bathroom.

Little Bug does not forget a thing – ever. On the return flight, she remembered we had gone to the back of the plane to change her diaper. My mom and I decided that we were just going to change her diaper by laying her across us on our laps. Little Bug stood up and started pointing to the back of the airplane. She said, “Back der (there)!”

I packed Little Bug a lunch and she had her lunch siting on Grandma’s lap about an hour before we landed in Texas. (Another good entertainer for the airplane — especially when your baby loves to eat!)

And then we jokingly laid Little Bug down across Grandma and Grandpa’s laps and told her it was naptime. Yeah right. As if she was actually going to close her eyes and go to sleep and miss out on all the action! She later took a much needed 2.5 hour nap once we got to Mimi and Papaw’s house.

Overall, Little Bug traveled very well going and returning home. Coming home, she was fussy simply because she was tired from being the life of the party for six days straight! Little Bug didn’t get the sleep she needed on most days because of various activities (Which is totally fine! We were on vacation!) but it really is amazing to me just how much adequate sleep plays into having a happy child. We came home from the airport, ate lunch, and then Little Bug took a 2.5 hour nap and then went to bed at her normal bedtime and slept for 12 hours!

I could definitely see a difference in Little Bug’s overall disposition, but to everyone else, she probably just seemed like the typical happy, full of life, funny little girl that she is because overall, she did wonderful on this trip!

It is also amazing to me how a scheduled toddler can get totally off schedule (and be okay doing so) and then when you get home, they fall right back into the normal schedule.

More posts coming about the fun we had in Texas!!

We had a WONDERFUL time in Texas!