Shortly after our marriage in May of 2007, we began trying to conceive. My plan had always been to get married and have a baby right away!
When all pregnancy tests had been stark white every single month, we went to see an RE in early 2008.
During our four IUI cycles (one of which was cancelled), I started to learn that I was not in control of my life at all. God was in control and He had a plan in all this.
I clung to the scripture found in Jeremiah 29:11, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
All three IUI cycles ended in a negative pregnancy test result.
Towards the end of 2008, I underwent laparoscopic surgery in which endometriosis was found and excised.
As 2008 became 2009 I was so anxious to know the plans God had for my life! I knew the pain and heartache I was experiencing was temporary, but it didn’t make waiting for God to reveal His plan any easier!
Waiting is hard, but it was during those months of waiting that God taught me that He has a plan for my life that is bigger and better than anything I could ever plan for myself.
As the new year came and we were gearing up for our first in-vitro fertilization (IVF) cycle something completely unexpected happened.
God opened our hearts to adoption.
On January 10th, 2009, God put this poem on my heart and I put in on paper never imagining what was to come:
Our miracle has come
Not in my womb, but in our hearts
We are going to adopt!
Baby is on the way!
She will be here in the month of May.
I had a frame with the word "Miracle" written on it. I placed the poem in the frame and then set my mind on what I knew was to come: our IVF cycle.
March 8th, 2009, is a day that will always be imprinted in my mind. It is the day we learned pregnancy for us would most likely never happen. I did not respond well to the IVF meds and our cycle was cancelled.
Laying on the table in the RE’s office on that Sunday morning I felt God leading us to adoption instead of trying another IVF cycle. Part of me was not ready to give up my childhood dream of pregnancy and childbirth after only one try at IVF, but after arguing with God for a time, all He told me was, "TRUST ME!"
And so we started feverishly working on our adoption paperwork and gathering the required documents to give to the agency.
By the beginning of April 2009, we had everything ready to turn in to the agency.
On April 9th, 2009, I walked into the agency, handed the lawyer our paperwork and heard the most amazing words ever.
"We had an adoption fall through this week. If you would like to have a baby girl in June you can have one!", the lawyer told me.
Forty-eight days after I left the lawyer’s office I witnessed the birth of my daughter.
My daughter was not born in the month of June like the lawyer had said. My daughter was born in the month of May!
I most likely will never conceive and give birth to a biological child.
I am not living my childhood dream.
I am living the Something More God had planned for me and my heart could not be more content.
